Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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