did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
