I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Randomize
