let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
The uberlube is also flammable
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
