Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
