I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I got her a Nickelback box set.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
