when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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