I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
