Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize