my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
