There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
