Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize