btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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