well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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