I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
