You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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