I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
vagina is talking i cant
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
