But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
