So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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