you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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