is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
