Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i think my tv is drunk
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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