She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
