i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize