I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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