apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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