Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
