At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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