2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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