So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
