Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
