don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
