is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
