And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
