Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
