i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
