i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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