you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
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