Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
