That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
