just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
