Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
