ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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