Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
