i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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