this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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