i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Floor bacon is actually really good
Randomize
