I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
handjob tips. give me some.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
