toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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