I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Four minutes until I can fart!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
